A State of Non-Being

One describes sleep ineffably
Before they succumb to the state of blankness,
The mind is abuzz with concerns of the living
Instances of life are replayed and regretted
Guilt inundates the mind
Till we nevertheless fall helplessly into our nihilistic refuge
Soon enough dreams fill the canvas of our minds,
Where are we?
Is this any different than the reality set before us?
Meaningless dreams are forgotten
While significant ones forge on through the empty planes of sleep
And persist after we wake and find ourselves breathing life
Wakefully, we recover from the pacifying darkness of our netherworld
We re-begin our mundane lives where we seek out knowledge
To provide ourselves meaning within the world from which we
Might not wake back up again
We must struggle valiantly to scope out artistic wonders and grandeur structures
All in attempt to forestall the inevitability of the perpetual sleep
Where we no longer are conscious of our wakeful selves
Before I fall asleep permanently,
I cling to the illusions of love which may soon be forgotten
In the abysmal darkness of a church
I pray earnestly to a God who is not there
To assuage the terror of my conscious soul
For the oblivion is upon me and
I refuse to slumber peacefully and lifelessly
Under the pretense of “living life to the fullest”
Upon the ornate cross above me
Jesus appears sorrowful as he frightfully screams to God
Before submitting to death:
“Why hast thou forsaken me?”
This same question fills my panicked brain
As the beat of my heart accelerates then fitfully slows
Till my death is brought to fruition
Unless there truly is a God
Hidden within the complex fabric
Of the accidentally-placed universe
Then cause, effect, and sleep
Are Rendered Untrue
Once the miracle of life
Becomes crucified by inexplicable death
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